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We knew until then to be this independent, outgoing girl with an “optimistic character,” fixing problems by myself without relying on my man that I might have forced myself. Perhaps I experienced been attempting to show one thing, in this culture where people anticipate girls become submissive and quiet.

It’s been 2 yrs since our relationship finished. Wef only I could state my understanding brought me personally freedom that is complete sex norms or objectives of other people, nonetheless it didn’t. We had doubts about that I was keen on remaining an outgoing, independent woman whether I was good enough a girlfriend to him considering. The greater we discussed our future, the greater amount of afraid we became that i would never be his perfect life partner. We maintained fretting about whether i possibly could satisfy his buddies or moms and dads’ expectations of the “good girl.”

My worries are not the only reason we parted methods, however they had been definitely an issue.

Dating him, as well as others before that, has permitted me personally to see my self-contradictions and insecurities. I will be self-conscious of my independence and womanhood. I’m saturated in contradictory desires, attempting to be my own self, whatever that could be, but in addition planning to satisfy South Korean society’s criteria on which a woman that is proper be. All of the individuals we have actually met in school, at workplaces, also at home have actually affected me personally. It dawns on me personally that my battle isn’t pretty much fighting South Korean men’s expectations of how ladies need to behave. We discovered that i have to fight my personal objectives for myself, too.

I’m nevertheless learning on how to balance society’s needs on ladies and my traits that are internal. Nonetheless, now we’m certain I don’t need certainly to suppress my ‘girlish’ impulses in attempting to be a separate girl. It’s Valentine’s Day, and I also have always been enjoying chocolate that is making my very own. We no further categorize this task as a womanly task. It is just a spare time activity, that’s all. We additionally notice that alleged behaviors that are girlish aegyo and naesung aren’t the protect of females. Guys may do these plain things as well as ladies.

The revelations to my component might be uncomfortable for many Southern Koreans to keep. (they may state making chocolate is a woman’s pastime and males never do aegyo or naesung.) But i have to thank the South Korean guys we have dated — also individuals who have been therefore critical of me — for leading me https://hookupdate.net/tr/chatki-inceleme/ down this course of self-discovery. And I also look ahead to meeting the man that is next may help me find out about whom i really have always been.